Friday, February 3, 2012

How Do People Remain Friends With Their Exes?

Everyone has a movie that speaks to them. For some, it’s a movie frame or just a title. Well, I have certain movie frames that speak to me-in different ways. In ‘Top Gun’, starring Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz, there’s this frame I really like. It’s that part where
Cruise and Diaz are in a car on a truck (quite complex, don’t bother figuring that out). They’ve had a long day, been chased by the bad guys and all. He looks at her and says

‘You can sleep now. I’ll protect you. I am good at what I do. I assure you that tonight, you can sleep’ Yeah, I like that ‘I am good at what I do’ line. I look forward to using that line. In my case it would be pretty awkward though. Maybe her project would have been rejected five times. Then in, I appear, with my purple netbook in the cusp of my elbow. Then say ‘I am good at what I do, you can graduate now. It still lacks that badass punch.
Okay, another one is an 007 movie. Pierce Brosnan is supposed to go meet an arms dealer. Queen wonders how he would infiltrate the arms dealer’s lair. Then she remembers Bond once had a liaison with the dealer’s wife. Bond goes there and as is typical, sweeps the ex off her feet. Infact, her dealer husband has to murder his own wife at the end of the day.

Thing is, I was really impressed about how he could within minutes of meeting, get an ex back. That got me thinking. If the average guy had that much of a hold on his ex, the world would be such a good place. There would probably be no need for networking or campaigns on religious tolerance. I conducted a research among my coterie of friends on their relationships with their exes.

Well, Dapo had the classic answer..
"Me I hate dem after. Especially my last babe. I hate her lyk poop."
Ibidapo said, ", "Me I dey delete dem 4rm BBM, twitter, fb, yahoo, phonebook, text messages and so on. Me 2 I can’t handle it. When I broke up with my last babe, she said can we still be friends?, I’m like never. And I told her to look at me well cos dat would be the last tym she’ll see me face 2 face."
Phew!It kinda seems like it’s only in the movies that exes hibernate their emotions, to be awoken at the next chance meeting.
Right from time, I felt it was immature for people not to maintain a semblance of entente with exes. I mean, exes are just a level lower than a divorced couple, right? There should be something to share. Anyways, I also flipped through my mental rolodex of exes, I didn’t feel so amiable after some introspection.

So my research continues. There people, let me know what you think bou’ this. I remain boggled by that thought though, how do people remain friends with their exes?


Anonymous said...

Well, I'd say its different strokes for different folks... Personally, I don't see any plausible reason not to be friends with my ex... That is, with the exception of those ones that r not so amiable after the breakup and all. In actual fact, I hv my ex-es on my BBM and tho some may say that means they still have a hold on me, I'd say that's not so. We were friends b4 we ever went out and we are still friends... For some, that may sound weird but like I said before, it's *Different strokes for different folks*.
@ Osisiye, Nice one there... :)

Anonymous said...

I don't tink am in the best of positions to comment on this as I am only in my 2nd 'ship,and the first mite even qualify more as a prologue than an "act"..
in my opinion,it depends in wot led to the break up and

Anonymous said...

I don't tink am in the best of positions to comment on this as I am only in my 2nd 'ship,and the first mite even qualify more as a prologue than an "act"..
in my opinion,it depends in wot caused the break up and au it my ex and I maintain a gud relatnshp,doh we see less often,which is normal......
one can't expect the same aftermath frm a breakup caused by infidelity and Anoda caused by incompatibility